How to Defeat Approach Anxiety FOREVER

This article is going to teach you how to approach a girl without fear of rejection or failure. Soon, you’ll have the tools you need to overcome Approach Anxiety forever. You’ll finally be ready to start attracting beautiful women into your life each and every day.

Unfortunately, when most guys get started attracting women, they discover that they first need to cure approach anxiety. They see a beautiful woman and instantly feel a crippling fear that feels nearly impossible to overcome.

For some, this fear becomes too much and their approach anxiety beats them for good. Others will challenge themselves and approach women after women for weeks or months on end, hoping that it will eliminate Approach Anxiety forever.

But as many of those guys will tell you, even after approaching 100s of girls THE APPROACH ANXIETY IS STILL THERE!

So if simply approaching tons of women isn’t enough to cure approach anxiety, what is?

After overcoming my own fear of approaching women, and helping hundreds of men across the globe do the same, I’ve been fortunate to discover what really works to overcome approach anxiety forever.

One of the biggest reasons most guys continue to get approach anxiety after making numerous approaches is that they only approach women at specific times.

Most guys who want to get good with women will go out at specified times and approach beautiful women. During those times they’ll try to pick up girls with varying degrees of success, but the rest of the time they’ll go about life as if women didn’t even exist!

As soon as their life gets busy, they feel like they don’t have time to approach and they take a break. Once they are ready to start approaching again, they’re devastated to learn that their approach anxiety is back!

There is a HUGE problem with that mindset!

When you only approach at specified times than you’re not actually making it part of who you are. You’re going out and approaching, which is great, but you’re actually limiting yourself to being the guy who only talks to people on Saturdays and Wednesdays from 5 till 8!

What happens when the girl of your dreams passes you by on a Monday?

If you’re like most guys you’ll be feeling “rusty” or “not in the mood” and simply let her pass you by. After all, you only approach on the weekends – if at all.

The guys that get REALLY GOOD with girls don’t just make approaching what they do; they make it who they are.

These are the guys who live with PASSION, they are driven by their desires and live life on their own terms. They don’t go out solely to “pick up” women, they see a beautiful girl and they talk to her, regardless of what time of day it is or where they are.

Men that overcome their approach anxiety might still feel some fear for the first approach or two, but they accept it as something that is natural and push through it anyways.

If you want to truly overcome approach anxiety you must deal with the excuses that stop you from meeting women anywhere. Excuses like:

  • “I don’t want to meet women today, I’ve got too much on my mind”
  • “I don’t have time to approach her”
  • “She’s not THAT hot anyways”
  • “I’m just not in the mood”
  • “She looks too busy, I don’t want to interrupt”

Ask yourself, are these ever really valid excuses or are you just giving in to fear?

If you really want to get comfortable in approaching a girl without fear of rejection, and how to cure approach anxiety forever, IGNORE YOUR EXCUSES.  If you see a hot girl, go up and talk to her. Surely you have at least a few minutes to find out more about her.

Maybe she is bitchy, maybe you don’t have much time, but if you really want beautiful women in your life, taking those few minutes to talk to girls throughout your day will make a massive difference in your success. And this way, you’ll overcome approach anxiety for good and never feel rusty when your ideal girl walks past.

How to create more opportunities to approach throughout the day:

Hopefully by now you realize how important it is to approach beautiful women, wherever they may be. But how do you create the opportunities while going about your busy day?

Making approaching part of who you are requires that you constantly look for beautiful women while going about your day. Here are a few examples of great places to meet girls:

  • Grocery Store – While shopping for food, shop for new girls as well. As you’re getting what you need, look for attractive women, see how far into their shopping they are, and talk to them! Say whatever feels right for you but I like making jokes about what’s in their basket. If your really crunched for time, choose the till where you can stand behind a women and talk to her while you’re queuing.
  • Restaurant – Instead of sitting wherever the hostess seats you, scan the restaurant for any attractive girls and ask to be seated next to them instead. Once there, ask which food is poisonous, talk about what’s on their plate, or say whatever else is on your mind.
  • Train/Tube – Don’t just sit down in the first carriage available. Run along the train and look for one with an attractive girl to sit next to. If no one comes up, wait till the next stop, get off, and find another carriage to find girls. This way you can get to where you’re going and get a phone number to top it off. A word of caution though – don’t be too forward in these types situations. A more casual approach is more likely to be well received in this type of closed environment.

  • The Street – Walking down the street is an awesome way to bump into some amazingly beautiful women. Talk to every hot girl you see, run after them if need be and tell them how you feel. Tell her that you’re on your way to something important and then blame her for making you late. One of my favorite things to say is “I’ve got this rule where I talk to the first gorgeous women I see every day – it makes life exciting. Hi, what’s your name?” Why not? So what if you’re going to be late 5 minutes for something? THAT’S JUST AN EXCUSE!

By just making this one habit a part of your life you can cure approach anxiety FOREVER and ultimately end up with a load of new great women in your life.

Three simple rules to maximize your results:

  1. Always leave 30 minutes early. By leaving early, you’ll have time to meet people on the way to wherever you’re going. You’ll wipe out the “I don’t have time” excuse… in fact, by leaving early you’re actually creating time just to approach – subtly forcing yourself to do so when the opportunity arises! This is a key first step to changing your life habits.
  1. Approach the first cute girl you see every day. Whether you see her through a glass window and have to tap on it to get her attention or she’s across a crowded building and you have to burst through people to talk to her – do it! This will get you into a great social mindset that you can carry on throughout the day. It doesn’t have to be a long conversation, just go up and tell her how great she looks.  By making this one simple change, I have been on more dates in the last year than most guys have in a lifetime!
  1. 3. Play an on running game. I.E hot girl tag. Never worry about not having an opening line again. Simply walk up to every hot girl you see and touch her (on the elbow you pervert!) This will force you to come up with something to say on the spot. Or, if you can’t think of anything in the moment, say “tag you’re it” and explain that you are playing a game of “hot girl tag.” Women love this!

Tell her: Another great game to play is one called “tell her.”  Whenever you’re with a friend, if one of you says anything about any woman – and you’re friend says “ “tell her” you HAVE to go and tell the woman exactly what you just said. You can even explain to women the game that you’re playing – they don’t mind!  Mix this in with punching your friend every time you spot a cute girl and this will equal meeting a LOT of new people!

These rules and habits may sound a bit daunting at first, but I GUARANTEE YOU that by implementing them into your life, you’ll never have to ask how to approach a girl without fear of rejection again. You’ll be having so much fun and meeting so many women that overcoming approach anxiety will not even cross your radar.

More importantly, you’ll finally be the type of guy that women love. A spontaneous, fun, social guy that goes after what he wants and isn’t stuck in a boring routine.

So go out there and live your life.

Don’t set a time to meet women.

Make meeting women a part of who you are…. You won’t regret it!

Booooom shaka laka!! ;)


Sasha is one of Europe’s top independent daygame instructors … and runs some of the most intense and personalized daygame bootcamps in the world. Just 2 students per weekend! He’s usually in London but travels back and forth between North America and Europe regularly. For information on his programs, check out

If you’d like to get some simple and effective tools to adopt a more direct mindset with women, make sure to check this page

23 Responses to “How to Defeat Approach Anxiety FOREVER”

  1. youre drive really comes through in our writing.

    i love the ‘tag your it’!

  2. Crush on April 5th, 2010 at 2:36 pm
  3. Hey thanks dude ;) ……. yea it’s fun. I keep forgetting to use that on bootcamp!! damn it!! Thanks for reminder ;)


  4. Sasha Pua on April 5th, 2010 at 2:40 pm
  5. Great article man……different point of view as opposed to guys going out just for sarging…

  6. sidewinder on April 17th, 2010 at 9:04 am
  7. hwy sasha
    i notice andy and yad on
    if you see a woman, and you say this. could this work?
    Hi, you have cute shoes. she answers, . you say wear did you get them? she says a store . example, you tell her, is red your favorite color? she says yes or no. you ask her . i don’t go shopping much for shoes, either do my guy friends. you say, what’s the experience like when you go shopping on your own , and your girlfriends?

    in a club, or day game or both could you use this?

    one more an opener,

    how is your day treating you so far?

    what is best approach if you walk in a store to talk to a store employee and girl customer in store?


    ps what do you think of pua


  8. michael on July 17th, 2010 at 11:51 pm
  9. Let’s have that in English, bit more organized, and a bit less value takey (see:more sucking up) and I just may attempt to answer ;)

  10. Sasha Pua on August 4th, 2010 at 6:58 pm
  11. the (tell her) game really helped a lot,most funny way to loose A.A i know thanks man
    i still have A.A but it’s not excuse anymore

  12. Lex on January 6th, 2011 at 12:31 am
  13. This is phenomenal insight…..

  14. imtan ali on February 19th, 2011 at 11:20 am
  15. there’s this girl i like at school, i can approach her but i dont know what to say and she is always with her friends…plz help

  16. daluna on March 16th, 2011 at 7:08 am
  17. First of all, for me to answer your question you’ve got to suck up to me a bit and tell me how awesome I am ;)

    Secondly, you need to tell me more info …. DETAILS, FUCKFACE!

  18. Sasha Pua on March 17th, 2011 at 4:04 am
  19. hi there
    you are stunning?
    so how do you continue a conversation without playing it safe like most guys?
    how about You are stunning and I would like to get to know you.
    or? you are stunningly beautiful. and start conversation.
    says this is great opener.
    excuse me,
    but I couldn’t help but notice you were walking here. I wanted to let you know that you are a stunningly beautiful woman.
    or you could say, what type of environment i could imagine bar sports bar nightclub street. could following openers be used if woman at starbucks grocery store clothes store woman looking at clothes? or no?
    Excuse me,
    I wanted to let you know that you are a stunningly beautiful woman.
    they say on this site that:
    in 95% of all cases is a mix of stunned belief mixed in with blushing and immediate like towards you. pressure will be off of you,
    he also says follow up with comments about how attractive you are towards her, woman will continue conversation with you, and you would love too meet her for a drink or meal sometime. it’s couregeous and woman like men who take risks It’s honest and to the point . They know where they stand with. could you ask a woman what makes you attractive as a person? at what point in conversation can you ask this?

  20. michael on March 23rd, 2011 at 3:12 am
  21. Booooom shaka laka!! ;)

  22. alex on October 12th, 2011 at 12:17 pm
  23. Some awesome stuff on this site mate. It’s really motivational, and whilst in the past i’ve read material but got rusty and got in a really ‘can’t be bothered mood’. But i’m back into the mood now, and i’m determined for it to work this time! I find from experience talking to people makes me feel in such a good mood opposed to not talking to people. Thanks again.

  24. Ben on November 14th, 2011 at 12:51 am
  25. Hey cool man…..hopefully you’ll leave me a “you got me laid” comment some point soon ;)


  26. sasha on November 28th, 2011 at 3:59 pm
  27. Hey Sasha & the rest of the crew, so I started doing some of these direct approaches, I only been doing this for a week, and I seen to keep getting a frown, a snarl, or just a “whatever flake”, and some other derogatory remarks like, “get away from me”, “I’m busy”, etc, just a lot of bullshit coming out of their mouths after saying in a direct fun way what I am focused about on them, can anyone give me some feedback on how to respond more effectively rather than telling them, “I figured you were a waste of time and space, gotta go” and believe me I get under their skin at that point and really blow it. I just need to tone it down, but can’t think of any quality things to say after I get the “Why did you bother approaching me look often with a snide remark” Help me out guys, I’m accelerating into a heated mode 4 dude real soon. -Bernd

  28. Bernd on February 27th, 2012 at 11:42 am
  29. Jut do not see who made these women such a prize.They sound awful just from the headaches these men in trying to deal with them.Is this worth it?

  30. DAVE on February 29th, 2012 at 5:57 pm
  31. Hey you sexy son of a bitch. Strawberry here again.

    Another really good read Sasha. You were bang on with those excuses; I used to have them many moons ago (oh what a loser I was).

    Watched video of you recently and I have to compliment you on the way you approach a girl from the side over the bannister as she is walking down towards a tube. It gives her the unique opportunity to walk away if she’s not interested, and the ones which are interested will stop and chat in a more intentional manner. Very clever, will be using that soon.

    Anyway, I have an apt question in relation to your article.

    So I’ve been away from your site for some time, mainly cz I’ve been approaching and all has been going very well (as I let you know previously). Furthermore, I’ve taken another work colleague under my wing for coaching with some of my own new techniques with some sound results (lets just say we got rid of his AA as a good start).

    Now 2 weeks ago I got a kidney infection man. Yeah it sucks, cz I haven’t been to work, the gym, I pretty much haven’t left the house. Couple of days ago I approached a gorgeous brunette in Tesco (with a smile that nearly knocked me over) but I’d lost an edge. Something was missing and my chat with her was what I class as a failure (failure being I didn’t deliver cz I class a success as both a number close OR being turned down BUT still managing to make the girl smile and feel good about herself).

    So is there anything you could tell me and our readers how to stay on top of their game if they’re ill where they actually are physically unable to approach (a non-excuse to approach)?


  32. Strawberry on May 20th, 2012 at 3:53 pm
  33. To make it a more easier question, what do you do Sasha if you’re felling low or just generally had a ruff day?


  34. Strawberry on May 20th, 2012 at 7:12 pm
  35. [...] 3 Originally Posted by mail3idplo Guys, I was hanging out with friends, so I haven't been able to go out the past couple of days. I plan to go out tomorrow though. Also, my friend might be down for approaching with me. I talked to him about my latest rejection and he suggested going out and hitting on girls. I just red an article about excuses like that. You can find it here: How to Defeat Approach Anxiety FOREVER | Sasha PUA [...]

  36. My Journey From Chode To Boss. - Page 26 on June 19th, 2012 at 10:06 am
  37. Man up and stop being a fuckface.. shitty day or not your in control of your mood not the day you had..

  38. Saasha on June 21st, 2012 at 1:14 am
  39. Yeah, “man up” and make an ass out of yourself for the entertainment of someone whom you do not even know. Just sounds like lots and lots of fun, so hurry and MAN UP!

  40. dave on July 27th, 2012 at 2:47 am
  41. Hi Sasha I think you are great. I’d love to meet up with you next time you are in London (just friends) not friends zone though lol. Just kidding. You are very interesting. I would love to take you for dinner and chat if you fancy it. Let me know.

  42. Lisa James on October 13th, 2012 at 5:34 pm
  43. Man, I kinda already noticed it.
    But I was not able to put that in words.

    Now I clearly see…that’s the key.

    Thanks for sharing.

    Greetings from São Paulo..

  44. Aka Zap on November 2nd, 2012 at 10:37 pm
  45. you’re welcome. Hey, I’m coming to Rio soon bro… you coming to hang out or what? ;)

  46. sasha on November 9th, 2012 at 12:33 am

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