Some of you may or may not know that I’m a poker baller
I started out hustling 7 card stud games in 2003-2004, then played and made quite a few final tables on tourneys at my local poker club the Gutshot in London. I even won some flights to Vegas and an entry to a $2000 event. Oh yeah.
Recently though, I’ve even done well against some big names in the poker community.
I played Serkules (currently ranked number 1 hyper heads up player in the world) — we played out of 11 games and I won 6-3. (We didn’t have to finish, as I won more than half already)
Also I tied Daniel Cates (aka the Jungleman) out of 10 tourneys….
But that’s enough bragging
After my 10 games of heads-up poker against Dan – who if you ask me – is the best heads up player in the world – we had a bit of a chat. If you don’t know Mr Cates – He’s beaten Patrick Antonius, Tom Dwan, Phil Ivey, and all the other “world-class” players. So he really is world class.
I thought I would share some of my thoughts on this topic with ya’ll.
If you approach a woman who you’re not really attracted to, or during a conversation you realize you’re just not really interested in her, simply END THE CONVERSATION. It’s really that simple. You look’em in the eye, and you say “Hey, this was fun. It was nice to meet you” and you WALK AWAY.
Simple, isn’t it?
The problem with NOT walking away, is once in a while you’ll stick in there for whatever reason because you think you might get laid. The problem with that is, that occasionally, you WILL get laid. With some woman you’re not actually interested in. this leads to all sorts of problems because in many cases, guys will continue seeing this girl, merely because they are getting laid.
First off, there’s a distinction I make that is often more instructive than the inner game / outer game distinction:
Fundamentally, there are 2 aspects to look at when trying to improve your game:
1. Everything you do before, between, and after an approach
2. What you do during an approach itself.
For most guys, (1) is actually 90% of the ‘journey.’ This is everything from going to the gym, eating right, dressing well, getting a fulfilling career, making friends, travelling, reading, playing team sports, cultivating a positive mindset, and so on. If the vast majority of this side of things is handled, chances are women are already entering your life and are probably already attracted to you – it’s just a matter of putting yourself out there a bit more and maybe learning some mechanics / ‘technique’ of how to approach more effectively.
A guy recently wrote to me, saying that he feels that by approaching women he might disturb them.
WHAT IF THEY THINK HE’S A NUISANCE??
What if they think he’s RUDE???
WHAT IF IT’S AN IMPOSITION????
“An imposition??? Insulting?? Shit, NOT approaching a beautiful woman on the street is INSULTING to her. She spends all this time getting dressed, doing her make-up, eating right, going to the gym… and now you’re just going to walk by and not even let her know she looks good?
Hidden Agendas Behind Female communication – part one
-By Detail Janson
As I sat down and began to organize my thoughts for this article, I was reminded of my buddy’s experience surfing in Gansbaai off the coast of South Africa. At first, the connection seemed random and obscure, but soon the emotional and experiential correlation my mind was making became lucid to me. According to my buddy, the waters of Gansbaai offer some of the best waves on earth, and the adventure on the surface is nothing short of thrilling. It is also known as “Shark Alley.” In the dark waters below the enchanting waves lie dangers that can rise to forever change the course of one man’s life. Welcome to dating! As we navigate the waters of female communication, we are not unlike the surfer on his wooden board. Out of his natural environment, completely unequipped for the dangers of the sea, the surfer learns to read the waters in ways that the average swimmer cannot. He looks to his surroundings for clues. He becomes adeptly attune to the totality of the environment in order to correctly discern his situation and respond appropriately. In short, in exchange for the thrill of the waves, he has learned to listen and interpret in a new and unfamiliar way, as he has accepted the simple truth of his dilemma: he is out-gunned and he is prey. When a woman opens her mouth, you better be prepared to do the same.
My writings are for men. But this article, is for you. The purpose of this article is to give you perspective on the intent of my writing, and brief insight into why men study game.
My goal is to give men perspective on female behavior. My goal is to put men in your shoes and show them the world of courtship through your eyes.
I want to save you from the discomfort of having suitors ask “What did I do wrong? Please tell me what to do,” and help them be resilient when they’re left without answers.
Every man is absolutely amazing in some aspect of their lives.
And, they deserve to know what you’re thinking when the unexpected happens. Men deserve to know which of their behaviours you don’t respect, and to know how you punish them for underestimating your communication skills.
Seen any attractive Women lately?
Spoke to all of them, did you? Didn’t think so….. OH NO! – you’ve got “Approach anxiety!!!” Guess what – your dating life is not going to be what you want it to be.
Look, I’m not going to bullshit you.
YOU NEED TO GET YOURSELF SORTED!
If you’re really worried SO much about the social consequences of your actions that this prevents you from doing what you want to do – you’re going to suffer endlessly in the long run. Whether it’s worrying about what women think of you, whether she’ll reject you, judge you, think you’re weird- or worrying about what other people may think about your behaviour – taking heed of any type of feedback other than your own is going to sabotage every opportunity for success you get in life.
By Succumbing to this irrational fear, you are destroying your god-given, natural ability to do WHATEVER it is in life you want to do – including approaching the women you biologically are here to breed with.